Friday, August 30, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: New Articles for August 2013

Adoption / Foster Care
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New Articles for August 2013
Aug 30th 2013, 01:00

This month I focused mainly on some basics of foster parenting - communication skills and what to expect with new foster placements. Also, please welcome our latest adoption search volunteer - Francis Thatcher!

What topics would you like to see me cover in future articles?  Please comment below with your ideas. Thank you.

Suggested Reading/New Articles and Features:

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Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: Happy Adoption Reunion Anniversary to Us!

Adoption / Foster Care
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Happy Adoption Reunion Anniversary to Us!
Aug 28th 2013, 08:00

First Meeting, Photo © Carrie Craft

Another year has gone by and it's amazing to me that it has now been 18 years since the adoption reunion with our sister, Pam. I think I remember things because I document almost every major event in my journal.

"Yesterday, August 28, 1995, I met my sister Pam for the first time. My first thought as she stood outside the door is that she is beautiful."

As time has gone by my sisters and I, as well as other members of the family, have pondered many things about Mom's decision to choose adoption. We may never know the answers to all of our questions, and to be honest, many of our questions are probably none of our business. But I do know one thing - I'm very grateful to have met our sister Pam and to have a relationship with her. I wish we lived a bit closer, but we get together when we can and just like our first meeting, it's like we were never separated. We don't seem to miss a beat. Note: Odd senses of humor must be genetic.

Please share your happy adoption reunion stories. I'm sure we would all love to hear them. If your adoption reunion was not as happy we can benefit from those experiences as well. Share how an adoption reunion or even the lack of has had an impact on your life and family.

Our first meeting that August evening in 1995, Chrissy, Charla, Pam, & Carrie.

Photo © Carrie Craft

________________________________

Suggested Reading:

Adoption Reunion and the Adoptive Family

Before You Enter Into an Adoption Reunion for Birth Parents

Before You Enter Into an Adoption Reunion for the Adoptee

Before You Help Your Child Enter Into an Adoption Reunion for Adoptive Parents

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Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: Looking Out for Developmental Grieving

Adoption / Foster Care
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Looking Out for Developmental Grieving
Aug 27th 2013, 20:54

It seems like each fall the number of children that enter foster care shoots up with the start of school. This is probably due to teachers and other school officials making reports of abuse and neglect.

One of the issues that we may need to watch for as foster and adoptive parents is developmental grieving or grief that is triggered by anniversaries. A child may not remember the events of that day but somewhere in his body he remembers the trauma of being removed from the home and having to be temporarily or permanently uprooted. We may see behaviors on the anniversary of the move into state's custody, other traumatic events in the child's life, birthdays, or holidays.

To help the child cope try a few of these 8 ideas.

What have your done to help a child grieve? Are there anniversaries of grief that have surprised you?

Click "comments" below and share your ideas.

________________________

Suggested Reading:

Steps to Understanding Grief and Loss in Children
Elements that Impact a Foster or Adopted Child's Grief

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Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: Finding Adoption Announcements for Older Child Adoptions

Adoption / Foster Care
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Start taking a college level music theory class today.

This beginner class is now accessible to aspiring musicians of all ages. Learn all of the basic concepts in an easy to follow manner.
From our sponsors
Finding Adoption Announcements for Older Child Adoptions
Aug 21st 2013, 08:00

When I was trying to find some ideas for making my son's adoption announcements I had a very difficult time finding anything that wasn't covered with teddy bears or hearts. So I decided that I needed to make my own. Here are the simple step-by-step instructions for making the announcement I created for our last adoption.

How Did You Tell Family and Friends that You Were Going to Adopt a Child?

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Friday, August 16, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: The Comments and Rude Questions that Really Hurt Our Children

Adoption / Foster Care
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The Comments and Rude Questions that Really Hurt Our Children
Aug 16th 2013, 08:00

I've decided that I'm tired of rude people. I'm especially tired of rude people who think a simple, "just kidding" fixes all. I'm also tired of people who seem to believe that since a child is adopted that it's OK to ask questions about the child's "real family" or to say that they don't like a foster or adopted child in my home.

Do they honestly believe that since the children do not share the DNA of the parents that it just will hurt or offend less? We expect this behavior from children, but shouldn't adults just know better? (or am I expecting too much?)

Since school has already started in some areas or is starting soon in others, and that seems to be when children have the most issues with nosy classmates and parents, that we should explore this issue again.

I've met many adoptive parents who have experienced this same behavior. I thought we'd take a bit of time and just vent and share some the rude comments we've received about the children we love.

___________________________________

Suggested Reading:

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Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: A Children's Book Designed to Help Non-adopted Children Understand Adoption

Adoption / Foster Care
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A Children's Book Designed to Help Non-adopted Children Understand Adoption
Aug 13th 2013, 08:00

Cover Art Courtesy of Wisdom Press

Since school is starting soon, I thought it appropriate to bring up a children's book, What is Adoption? Helping Non-adopted Children Understand Adoption, as an excellent resource for adoptive families.  We found this book to be very helpful in helping to educate young friends.

When my daughter was a little girl, she had a good friend named Caleb. He and his family had been around our family for several years. When they were in about the third grade, he started making observations about our family. He told my daughter on several occasions that because the boys were adopted, she doesn't have any "real" brothers. I overheard these comments and asked him if since the boys aren't real brothers, if I was their fake mom. He said, "Well, yeah. Kinda."

At the time, I didn't know how to address this with him. I then received the book What is Adoption? for review. I asked Caleb to read it and asked if he wouldn't mind submitting his own quick review.

After spending several minutes reading, he brought the book back to my desk. "Caleb," I asked. "Has this book changed your mind and feelings on what a real family is and that Jordan's brothers are her brothers?"

His eyes widened, he nodded his head, and simply said, "Yeah."

He then handed me a note with his review that read:

"A great book to learn about friends who are adopted."

How can I give a stronger, more positive review than that?

Cover Art for What is Adoption? Helping non-adopted children understand adoption courtesy of Wisdom Press.

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Sunday, August 11, 2013

Adoption / Foster Care: School Starting This Week

Adoption / Foster Care
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School Starting This Week
Aug 11th 2013, 23:32

My little girl is going to be a Junior this year - an upper classman. It's so hard to believe - time does fly. Thursday is her first day back. This will be her second year since we first moved here last August, she won't be the new kid anymore. But, she will be driving. There is a new adventure with each new year. So, as you're preparing to send the kids off to school this month or early next, take a moment to remember all the new adventures your foster child will be embarking on this time of year. Is this a new school for your foster child? How do you help a child transition into a new school? Click "comments" below and share.

___________________________

So, are you ready to send them back to school? Let Guides Help!

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