I noticed on a past blog comment a reader asked the following:
"My husband and I have been foster parents for one and half year. We are waiting for a fost to adopt, but the four kids we fostered have all returned to birth parents. We are with a foster family agency, but I wonder how long are we going to have to wait. We are not picky as we do want an older child boy or girl age 8-11 years old. I have heard there is a big need for adoptive parents for an older child. This does not seem to be the case with us. I wonder if we should change our agency since our agency is only foster and don't specialize with adoptions. Does that make a difference. Please we need some suggestions from people."
I felt the same way when we first became foster parents, heard there was a huge need, but then stood empty for a year. If hadn't been working in a children's home and saw the need first hand, we would have probably quit. Yes. There is a need, so don't quit yet. Fostering to adopt is often a long wait. It's also a difficult journey for those who take on the challenge as it requires that the foster parent be pro-family reunification, but then also choose to adopt the child if the family does not complete the reunification plan. Sounds like this particular foster family has done an awesome job maintaining boundaries and helping a family reunite.
I think it does make a difference if you're not with an foster agency that specializes in adoptions. What we have done in the past is work with our foster care agency for foster placements, but then we also submitted our adoption home study with another agency that specializes in adoptions and foster care.
It's a difficult question to answer when each State handles adoptions and foster care differently, but it may be worth asking your social worker for an opinion on the matter. It doesn't hurt for more than one agency to be looking for a child that fits in with your family.
What advice would you offer this reader? Should she switch foster care agencies? Ask more questions? Or give it more time?
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